Love Letters to Chefs Teachings | Wellbeing inspiration for chefs

Balance is not the destination – II

Chef preparing food in an outdoor kitchen.

To conclude this series, my final message to you is that balance does not come from yoga classes before service or from drinking turmeric lattes. As valuable as they might be to your wellbeing.

Conversely, this means that balance can be accessible to you, even if you do not have the time or resources to enjoy the latest wellness trends.

What really helps is to find balance moment-to-moment. Of course, this is not easy. It takes a great amount of self-awareness too.

It is much easier to feel calm, relaxed and present on the yoga mat than in the world out there. And of course, some of that calm might stay with you for a while afterwards. But this is far less easy to sustain.

Now, being able to access that feeling of balance whenever you need it – think of how valuable that would be! Especially in service professions like ours, where we are constantly being pushed and pulled in so many directions?

This is what I teach in my workshops for Hospitality teams (email me for details). After all, the power is in each and every one of us. Not in the yoga class or the turmeric latte or whatever the wellness flavour of the month might be.

Balance is not the destination

Photo of a chef standing with arms crossed across the front of his apron.

You might have heard me say this before: balance does not depend on your rota, but depends on how effectively you spend your precious free time.

Balance is not something that you will find in your next job, but something that can be available to you right where you are.

Balance is not meant to be the destination, but it has to be part of your journey in Hospitality.

Finding balance in a demanding industry like ours is about finding ways to recover from the physical, mental, emotional, energetic toll that your shift takes on you.

Balance is not about enjoying an Instagram-cool life: more often than not, it is simply about getting as much sleep as you can before the alarm goes off, booking and making sure you attend an important medical checkup, being there for your partner when they are going through something difficult, listening attentively to a child who is excited to share some news with you, or catching your breath before the start of service.

The last thing I want to say is not to make balance something that is out of your reach or conditional on external circumstances.

Resonate with this? Let me know.

Women in the Food Industry article

“Work life balance normally feels out of reach to just about everyone who endures our long hours. But add to that dynamic the need for a woman to constantly prove herself, to always be vigilant about her safety, to put up with being treated as someone “less than”, and to not get due recognition for her efforts – you have the challenge of someone who is constantly fighting for her place in the world.

What quality of rest can she be expected to enjoy as a result?”

– An excerpt from my article titled Work Life Balance for Women in Hospitality for Women in the Food Industry. But the other side of the story is that we have something as women that works in our favour when it comes to finding balance.

You can read the entire article here.

Not always yoga classes or turmeric lattes

A female baker selecting baked goods from a window-facing display, while a male customer stands outside the bakery.

What could change in the next three months?

These are some of the things that could happen:

– You could enjoy calm as you head into work, rather than be stressed the minute you step out of your home.

– You could fully relax on your days off, without worrying about how your team would cope without you.

– You could experience ease in leading your team, instead of simply getting through one shift to the next.

But will you choose that?

And I can promise you that none of this requires you to “do more”. The benefit of working 1-1 with you is that, as your coach, I can get straight to the root: what is currently preventing you from enjoying calm or feeling relaxed or experiencing ease in your work?

The solution is seldom yoga classes or turmeric lattes.

To find the solution we have to take a deeper look than that. Especially when you work in an industry with a complex culture, which adds layers of complexity to our challenges.

And I can help you with that – having worked in Hospitality I understand what is going on for you, but I am also trained to help you get to the other side: more calm, more free time, more flow in your work. More ways to make an impact on your team.

If you are a female leader in Hospitality and this is what you want over the next three months, let’s get to work.

Book a call with me or head to the link in bio. Applications to join this coaching cohort close on Monday 2nd May.

“Can I have a break?”

Two Hospitality workers eating a bowl of food outside a restaurant kitchen.

More than one coaching client has described to me the toll that comes from never switching off in Hospitality.

Whether that is actually taking your work home, answering calls on your days off, or simply worrying about how your team are doing in your absence.

You have my empathy if this is also your experience – because everyone needs rest.

You resent the fact that you feel more exhausted than you have ever been. You also feel isolated when you have to be the one everyone turns to for help. But when it comes to asking for support, you have no one to turn to.

You fear that this current situation might not be sustainable for much longer. As is common for us to do as women, you wonder whether this has something to do with your capabilities.

Now without knowing you or your work, I am confident that this is probably not the case. It could simply be that you put your heart into your career, and making it difficult for you to separate yourself from your work. With this comes the feeling of being always-on.

I support my coaching clients in becoming the kind of leader they want to be. Not by working harder or doing more, but by becoming more of who they truly are capable of being.

This month the coaching cohort is open to female leaders in Hospitality. If you think that you could benefit from “switching off” in order to enjoy more flow in your work, then let’s have a chat.

Here is your link to book a free call with me before the deadline of Monday 1st May. And please share this with anyone in your circle who needs some support with this.

Making it hard

Do you ever tend to wonder when leading your team will feel easy?

If this is you, my question to you is this: what are you doing to make it harder than it should be?

Because you are unintentionally making it harder for your team as well: when you do not feel settled in your role, neither will they. When you do too much, they never get to spread their wings.

More importantly, when you begin to doubt your abilities, they feel ineffective too.

This was not what you signed up for.

That unsettled feeling plagues your personal life as well: and you spend the hours away from work second-guessing yourself and your motives in taking on a leadership role.

What makes it harder is not having a role model or someone to turn to for advice.

If I were your coach, this is where I would help you step back gently. Back to your vision for what you wanted to achieve with your team. Back to the kind of environment you wanted to create for them and for yourself.

And then I would help you build that, step by step. Because you already have the answers and the know-how within yourself.

Ready to make leading a team be easy for yourself? Book a free coaching assessment call with me before 1st May.

Trying to do it all

Manager of café working on her laptop in front of the service counter.

Hands up if you are the type of person who is always trying to do it all.

You always impress others with your capabilities and accomplishments. And not to mention yourself, because you tend to set the bar higher each time for what you can achieve. Looking like you have it all together has become your identity.

But now, keeping up appearances feels exhausting.

For how much longer can you struggle to keep the operation running smoothly? And yet you hesitate to ask for support, because everyone is expecting you to be the one with all the answers.

At the same time, you worry whether you are headed for burnout. Because you cannot seem to shake off that exhaustion, even after a quiet weekend off.

You just want everything to feel easy again. Like when you had it all under control.

If this is where you want to get to, I can support you with that as a coach. Because I see both sides of the story – not just what you are going through in this moment, but also who you are when you are at your highest potential.

Let’s get you back there as soon as possible. I invite you to book a free 30-minute coaching assessment call with me today.

Coaching scholarships for female leaders in Hospitality

Image of three female chefs in the kitchen talking as they prep dishes.

LAUNCHING TODAY: 3 x Coaching scholarships for female leaders in Hospitality

I am writing today to ask you for your help, as Love Letters to Chefs is offering 3 x coaching scholarships this month.

I would love for you to help me get the word out to one woman in your circle who would benefit from this support:

Although she might be lucky to enjoy access to equal opportunities in Hospitality, being a female leader is still no walk in the park for her. This is an industry that offers very limited scope for who and what she can be. But she has bigger ideas for how she wants to make an impact.

But executing that vision alongside supporting her team and getting the work done is not easy. At times, it can get exhausting and overwhelming. And the lack of support can make her doubt herself. Needless to say, this then takes a toll on her personal life as well.

My intention as her coach will be to help her get from feeling exhausted and overwhelmed to feeing fulfilled about her work and her impact in the world.

To help her find her place, as the leader she wants to be.

All you have to do: Share this post with her.

All she has to do: Book a call with me by clicking the link below before the 1st of May.

And if you are already a part of this community and would like to apply for this scholarship, you know the drill! Book your call today.

Thank you in advance for helping me make this happen!
Ishoo

Make the most of new beginnings

Two male chefs demonstrating plating techniques to a female chef.

This message is for you if you are going through a big change right now: starting a new job, being promoted into a new role or launching a new venue or perhaps even your own business.

New beginnings are always exciting opportunities for learning and growth.

You find yourself soaking up everything like a sponge: new ways of doing things, new people to connect with, new techniques and processes.

But new beginnings are also opportunities to craft your life.

What do you want out of this new beginning? Do you want to:
– Finally fit in an exercise workout
– Co-ordinate family responsibilities so you are not trying to do it all
– Create a bedtime routine so you sleep better
– Set up systems so you can excel in your new role

There is no magic bullet here: you have to be a little intentional about the life that you want to create for yourself.

If you are ready to do this, then let’s make it happen. Book a call with me.

Working this weekend?

Of course, you are. Like you do every other festival or celebration, as is the way in Hospitality.

Given the nature of our work, there is probably not one person in our industry who escapes that feeling of missing out on life’s big events. Especially when those closest to us are forced to celebrate in our absence.

But you have to give yourself something in return. I do not mean a way of compensating yourself – because as Hospitality professionals this is something we accept as part of the game.

What I am referring to is that both polarities need to exist: yes, there is some amount of sacrifice you make in choosing this career, but equally, you choose yourself.

What does that look like? Perhaps saying yes to taking time off or booking a holiday. To enjoying a weekend away and trusting that your team can handle the pressure. Not feeling guilty when you have to turn down a friend’s invitation to party.

What will you choose for yourself after this busy weekend at work?