I’m reading a powerful book by Tara Sophia Mohr called Playing Big. She introduces a concept that I feel is important to share in an industry where we tend to sometimes take feedback personally.
Yes, it can sting. Our customers don’t react favourably to the new item on the menu. The head chef isn’t quite happy with our plating ideas. Our kitchen gets turned down for an award again this year. We put so much of our hearts into our work, so it’s natural to be attached to it.
But the book taught me that feedback is never about us. It’s tells us what’s important to the person giving the feedback, what they appreciate and what they’re looking for. Sure, we listen to that feedback if it’s important to us, but it has to be from a place of detachment: I’m feeling angry or dejected about this, but the truth is that I simply didn’t match their criteria.
And from that more neutral place, we can decide how to move forward, chef.