Work life balance conversations mostly revolve around wellbeing or burnout, without addressing this: dealing with the guilt that comes from always letting others down.
To say yes to working late often means saying no to time spent with a loved one. To fully enjoy your day off means enforcing boundaries with colleagues who normally rely on you.
This week I coached a business owner who admitted to struggling with work life balance. We talked through her work schedule and she was honest about the fact that she chose to work late every evening, instead of spending time with her husband.
She simply put the needs of her customers before her own. Which is not unusual, and those of you who run your own Hospitality business will agree.
As an intuitive coach, I hear words that are unspoken, more often than not. Throughout our one-hour session, I heard a heavy subtext of guilt, and it was speaking louder to me than her own voice.
You might think that you can easily rationalise what you need to do at work. Or why it holds more importance than something else.
But you are merely fooling yourself.
You might try to bypass strong emotions (like guilt) that come up, but they don’t go anywhere. The thing is, it all adds up.
Those unprocessed emotions get stored in your body, and over time, can lead to ill-health.
Also think about the quality of your relationships, if you always carry the guilt of making promises but not keeping them.
And then if you are a leader, that guilt can affect your ability to trust yourself.
Is it worth it, I ask you?
Something as small as a choice to work late – even with the good intention to serve a customer – can have serious consequences, if you are not 100% honest about how you feel regarding that choice.
So please make sure you do something to address that guilt.
And if I can support you with that, please get in touch right away. Through coaching I create a safe space to explore what’s not working for you, and how you can make it better. Plus, it’s completely confidential.